it's like that. only it's this.

questionably @ 2006-05-26T16:16:00

2006-05-26T22:16:42Z

I have a beautiful family.

don't bother

2005-10-21T21:14:30Z

WHAT NAME WOULD YOU RATHER BE NAMED THAN THE ONE YOU HAVE?
I used to not like my name. But now I really do. So I guess I wouldn't want to be named anything else

FAVORITE ART MOVEMENT OR PERIOD?
I have no idea.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ARRESTED FOR LEWD CONDUCT?
no, thank god.

FAVORITE DRUG?
I enjoy drugs far too much sometimes

WHAT ANIMAL ARE YOU MOST LIKE?
a cat, because I would be so happy sleeping all day and not having to worry about anything

DO YOU CHECK YOURSELF OUT WHILE PASSING MIRRORS? FOR HOW LONG?
ha. yeah. I get some funny loooks sometimes

IF YOU COULD BE WITH ANYONE RIGHT NOW...WHO WOULD IT BE?
i don't want to answer this question

FAMILY FEUD OR WHEEL OF FORTUNE?
both. seriously.

FAVORITE/LEAST FAVORITE WORD?
I love the word glorious. And hate the word twat. With a passion.

HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE YOU SLEPT WITH?
too many. or not enough. depending on how you look at it

DO YOU BELIEVE IN THE LOCH NESS MONSTER?
yes.

NAME 5 ASPECTS THAT MAKE UP YOUR DREAM BOY/GIRL.
a really really good sense of humor. someone who isn't afraid to be completely open with me. Similar philosophies on life and love. The ability to have a meaningful long lasting relationship without having to get married. Can make me smile jsut by looking at me.

SOUP OR SALAD?
salad

FAVORITE SONG TO REQUEST IN A JUKEBOX?
The Clash-- Should I stay or Should I go

THE BEST THING ABOUT TRUCK STOPS?
I'm not a huge fan of truck stops, actually

IN WHAT POSITION DO YOU SLEEP?
usually on my stomache with my arms under my head

THE WORST THING ABOUT HOLIDAYS?
it usually means you have to spend the whole day with your family, even when you don't like them. At all.

DAWN, OR DUSK?
Dusk

WHAT BAND'S REUNION CONCERT WOULD YOU MOST LIKE TO SEE?
Nirvana. But that would include haivng to bring Kurt Cobain back from the dead.

YOUR FAVORITE PAIR OF UNDERWEAR?
I like all of my underwear. And it's all pretty boring

CLOSEST MAJOR CITY?
Fort Collins, I guess. But you're probably thinking Denver

OCCUPATION?
Professional Student. And the office slave for the women's studies department

NUMBER OF BLANKETS ON BED (INC. SHEETS)?
3

PIECE OF FURNITURE YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT?
my bed. I'm dead serious. It's totally my best friend. ever

DO YOU SHOWER AT NIGHT OR IN THE MORNING?
it depends, usually in the morning

ORIGINALLY, WHAT COLOR WERE THE WALLS OF YOUR BEDROOM?
WHAT COLOR ARE THEY NOW?
white but now they are green

DO YOU PREFER TO HANG OR FOLD YOUR CLOTHES?
Hanging. I ahven't quite mastered the concept of drawers yet

VACUUMS: PAIN IN THE ASS OR HELPFUL TOOL?
we ahve hardwodd floors so I rarely ahve to vacuum. So now I don't mind doing it so much

HAVE YOU EATEN FRIES WITH MAYONNAISE?
that is really really disgusting

DO YOU KNOW HOW TO USE CHOPSTICKS?
kind of. but I can't really do it

DESIRED MODE OF TRANSPORTATION?
I want a vespa

BEST EIGHTIES FEEL-GOOD FILM?
I'm kind of fond of 16 candles

WHAT DO YOU DO ON WEEKENDS?
Homework. And occaisonally I venture out into the outside world

DO YOU ENJOY ALONE TIME?
most of the time

WHO DO YOU SPEND MOST OF YOUR TIME WITH?
My mom. isn't that cute. And by cute I mean kind of lame.

IF YOU WERE STRANDED AT HOME FOR A WEEKEND WITHOUT A COMPUTER AND A TV WHAT WOULD YOU DO TO ENTERTAIN YOURSELF?
read and catch up on writing letters. I like to send people mail

WHAT IS ONE THING THAT YOU WOULD LOVE TO LEARN?
to speak french fluently

WHAT ARE YOU REALLY GOOD AT?
making people think they are wrong even if they aren't. That's kind of mean, isn't it?

IF THERE WAS A BOOK ABOUT YOUR LIFE WHAT WOULD IT BE CALLED?
Doxy moron. it's a long story.

WHAT WORD DESCRIBES YOUR SENSE OF STYLE?
i don't really ahve a style. I wear what fits, what's comfortable and what looks fairly decent

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE ARTICLE OF CLOTHING?
these jeans I have that I can't describe. And my black sweater

DESCRIBE A TYPICAL OUTFIT YOU'D WEAR FOR SCHOOL.
a t shirt. Usually flip flops it it's not really really cold or wet. a sweater. my jean jacket or this beige courderoy jacket I have. And usually jeans. But not at the same time I wear my jean jacket. That really really bothers me when people do that.

WHAT SEASON ARE YOU?
I ahve no idea dn i don't really care.

WHAT'S A GOOD BRAND OF MAKE-UP?
Clinque but I rarely wear makeup anymore

HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE YOU TO GET READY TO GO OUT ON THE WEEKEND?
20-30 minutes. Sometimes longer if I ahve to take a shower before hand

SUM UP YOUR LIFE RIGHT NOW IN 5 - 10 WORDS?
Everyday is some kind of small revolution.

WHAT DO YOU DO IN YOUR SPARE TIME?
I don't ahve any spare time

WHAT ARE SOME OF YOUR FAVORITE RESTAURANTS?
Shari's, probably jsut because I eat there obsessively, because it's the only thing here. I don't know, other places

ON AVERAGE, HOW MANY TIMES A WEEK OR MONTH DO YOU GO OUT TO EAT?
almost everyday. Unless I'm broke and can't afford it

WHAT IS YOUR NATURAL SLEEPING PATTERN?
I usually don't wake up at all during the night. but I ahve been lately

WHAT MADE YOU DECIDE TO HAVE SEX FOR THE FIRST TIME?
I didn't decide.

WERE YOU IN LOVE?
No.

WHAT'S YOUR PREFERRED METHOD OF BIRTH CONTROL?
I'm on the patch

HOW MANY ROOMS DOES YOUR HOUSE HAVE?
8. that's a lot of rooms.

WHAT WOULD YOUR IDEAL LIVING ARRANGEMENT BE?
Move the house I'm living in right now into some little town in new england but close enough to where I could go to an actual city (like new york or boston) whenever I wanted to.

HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU MOVED IN YOUR LIFE?
3

WHAT CITY/STATE WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE IN?
I can't wait to move to San Fransisco

HAVE YOU EVER LIVED ON YOUR OWN?
nope

WHO DO YOU LIVE WITH NOW?
my mommy. and our two weener dogs.

questionably @ 2005-05-07T15:41:00

2005-05-07T21:45:57Z

I want to get dressed up and go to the horse races. Kind of like in Pretty woman except we aren't going to watch polo and I'm not a hooker.

This was actually pretty true...

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored.

You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.

Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage pessimistically. You don't think happy marriages exist anymore.

In this moment, you think of love as something you don't need. You just feel like flirting around and playing right now.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

questionably @ 2005-01-31T22:01:00

2005-02-01T05:01:59Z

kdeekates

If you read this,

even if i don't speak to you often,

you must post a memory of me.

It can be anything you want, it can be good or bad,

just so long as it happened.

Then post this to your journal. See what people remember about you

questionably @ 2004-12-04T11:30:00

2004-12-04T18:33:32Z

i just got black hair dye all over everything. I'm awesome.

stupid Laramie

2004-11-28T22:46:36Z

questionably @ 2004-11-25T21:32:00

2004-11-26T04:34:58Z

it never fails that i get lonely this time of year. And being so far away from everyone it makes it jsut that much worse.

I try not to be selfish, but I can't help having this void inide me. One that hurts so bad I almost can't breathe.

I'm happy about myself, for the first time I can remember, I love being me. So much. And that is really something I should be proud of. And I will be, for the rest of my life.

I am so thankful for all of you. I hope you feel the same.

I feel so fucking Emo right now. God.

Oh and I thought you'd all enjoy a picky-a-ture:

its enough to make me nervous

2004-11-18T02:36:06Z

I just got the best compliment in the world.

Find the boy who's on your level. One that can look you in the eye. He wont be intimidated, he'll be speechless.

I used to be scared that I would become completely comfortable with being alone. And now that I am fine with myself, its not so scary. I like being me. and I'm willing to wait for someone that likes me for being me.

its good to be comfortable with yourself. Its good to grow and learn and understand the world that is aaround you.

Its good to ahve goals and dreams and ambitions. Its good tobe me.

questionably @ 2004-09-10T15:19:00

2004-09-10T21:38:22Z

I wish I had more time to update.

Right now I ahve to clean my room and do homework.

I lvoe you and miss you all.

questionably @ 2004-08-03T22:16:00

2004-08-04T04:20:41Z

I guess I'm going to be mushy and vent for a minute.

I miss everyone so much. Its so much harder on days like this. everyone calls and emails and I get letters wanting to check up on me. its nice and i'm glad that I am keeping in touch, but it doesn't stop the fact that it makes insanely homesick. Then my mom and I start fighting because I have to pick a fight about everything and I jsut want to cry.

It will be easier when school starts.

I hope.

questionably @ 2004-08-02T19:29:00

2004-08-03T02:35:26Z

Mom: Ann, no matter what, you will always love your children

Me: Not if they are republicans. I'd rather them be serial killers that republicans.

I love being me.

and I hate people who think its okay to degrade women and then try to justify it.

questionably @ 2004-08-01T19:50:00

2004-08-02T02:51:35Z

I have been trying all day long to change my eyebrow ring, but the little ball thingy will simply not come off. its not fun.

SAD FACE x 10.

Yep, I'm bored.

questionably @ 2004-07-29T17:08:00

2004-07-30T00:09:01Z

i leave for Denver in the Morning. I'm wayyyy stoked.

I miss you all. a lot.

I hope you are all taking care of each other, I mean it.

Love.

questionably @ 2004-07-25T19:57:00

2004-07-26T02:58:12Z

Yeah, guess who is going to denver this weekend?

its going to ruleeee

questionably @ 2004-07-19T20:02:00

2004-07-20T02:03:39Z

yeah, my college bookstore so has a Clinique counter in it.

Wyoming Rules.

cross my state line, and bring yourself to me

2004-07-19T04:01:17Z

I was in a bad mood.

But then I played with makeup.

And now I'm not.

I love me.

questionably @ 2004-06-28T00:39:00

2004-06-28T07:44:23Z

I had fun tongiht. I really did.

But by the end I felt bad in a way that I shouldn't feel at the end of night of my 18th birthday.

I get sick of people douching out. i get sick of so many empty promises. I get sick of having to say good bye over and over again.

I simply should not be feeling this way right now.

and I don't know why, becuase I did have fun. I was surrounded by people i love. we did all the stuff you are supposed to do on your 18th birthday. And yet I still really want to cry. And I jsut don't know why.

I'm just so tired of things not working out.

questionably @ 2004-06-23T23:33:00

2004-06-24T06:37:34Z

yayyyyyyy.

I'm rich and almost not a minor anymore.

So I'm going to pierce something, just cause I can.

questionably @ 2004-06-19T11:46:00

2004-06-19T18:46:41Z

my dad was supposed tobe here at 11. he jsut called to tell me that he wont be here until one. I hate that.

Have a good weekend everyone

questionably @ 2004-05-29T22:56:00

2004-05-30T06:08:36Z

I feel so strange right now.

I am stuck halfway between being undyingly happy and feeling this awful feeling of regret and sadness. For what you ask? So many things that I feel as though my life may emplode around me.

the last month or so have been bittersweet about moving. On one hand, I feel as though I have nothing left here, except a handful of friends that I adore. On the other hand, i feel as though leaving here is like leaving everything I have and ever will have. My biggest fear of all is becoming completely comfortable with being alone. And I am afraid that my so called new start will simply reinforce that fact.

I am sitting here and I want to cry so much. Part out of being scared, part out of being so grateful that I can get out of this fucking town and partly out of complete sadness.

I spent the entire day with my dad today, And for the first time I was no longer with a stranger but I was with someone that actually cared about what happened to me. That was proud of me. That wanted me to do well. FOr the first time didn't look out for his own well being, but wanted to help become everything he wasn't. I sat there at Battle Point Park and looked at my family and realized that for the first time since I can remember, I loved them all. I wasn't mad or disaponted or holding a grudge. i had never been more grateful for them at that moment.

Awww, how sweet, My brother jsut caled me. Just to talk. I love that kid.

I don't know what to feel anymore. I really don't.

I lsot a close friend this week. And as much as I am completely releived of the stress that was brought on by this so called friendshiop, its till feels as though I am missing a limb. I miss him, but on the same token, i hate him and wish bad things upon him.

In 5 and a half weeks I leave this town. I head off for new horizons. All I can do is hope that things turn out for the best.

questionably @ 2004-05-26T20:22:00

2004-05-27T03:21:23Z